I want you here

I’m outside in the sun right now.

Bathing in the delicious and lazy warm beams.

And I realise that

I want you here.

I want you here.

I am usually hell-bent on being in love with being by myself, to never dare need another.

And I still am and still don’t.

But now I want you

Here.

I can’t exactly pinpoint what changed or why.

Maybe it’s the specific set of emojis that you use, that I now use too.

Or the incoherent yet precious ramblings that take place many hours after the sun has taken his leave.

Or maybe it’s the safety and the ease you bring.

The breeze has picked up now, a little. His cool arms gently swirl around.

The birds sing with playfulness and passion and the passing cars wheeze and grunt.

Despite the conflict and chaos, the world feels to be in unsaid harmony.

But I know to ‘want’ is illogical and irresponsible.

There are many reasons why I know I shouldn’t want.

So I’ll try my best not to.

I’ll remind myself that this want is a chemical imbalance and a simple blip in my rationality.

But I still do.

As pathetic as that may be, I still do.

The sun is hiding behind the clouds now, most likely because he’s sick of hearing about my tired troubles of the eternal battle between the heart and mind. Cliche indeed.

It’s cold now and I realise just how much I miss the sun.

His warm curls and all-encompassing aura.

I want you here.