I bought a dress the other day! And I am in love!
She’s pink, frilly, with puffy sleeves, a sweetheart neckline and little roses flowing throughout her. She’s the type of dress that reminds you of strawberry ice cream, velvety clouds during sunset and Doja Cat’s Hot Pink album.
She’s perfect.
She’s also part of the 4/7 online orders Punya and I have made during isolation. Whoops.
I’m wearing her right now!
It’s 9:30 pm on a Monday night, 14 degrees celsius and the only other witness of this divine dress is my doggo Bailey.
But it is the perfect time to wear her. Because I want to!
The only possible way to describe this piece of cloth is,
It sparks joy! (ily Marie Kondo <3)
I am not wearing this dress for anyone else except for me! And I realise, I do not need validation from anyone else except for me!
So I sit in my chair, the heater roaring and the Himalayan Salt lamp furiously glowing, and, ironically, reading the Handmaid’s Tale. For those not familiar with Atwood’s work, it is a tale of the suffering of women who exist only to be baby machines and/or decoration on an unfeeling and cold man’s arm. It is the story of a society that teaches all,
‘You only exist to please others, exclusively to breed and to be as docile and invincible as possible!”
I say no! Nay! Ew!
I don’t care to live for others and or seek approval from anywhere that is not me. Not anymore.
I am going to cultivate the land myself. Permaculture! Grow whatever fruits I want and decide what field I use. I want to sow, plant, water, reap it all myself and share the fruits of my labour with all!
I want to serve a higher purpose and myself simultaneously! Who the hell said you can’t do both?
So I sit here, deconstructing my psyche, prejudices and behavioural patterns, whilst looking all pretty for no one but myself.
And I realise,
Existing is so much more delicious this way!
And what a wild epiphany to be sparked from a pinky and frilly dress.
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